Give to Gain

The theme of this year’s International Women’s Day is Give to Gain. Their website describes it as emphasising ‘the power of reciprocity and support. When people, organizations, and communities give generously, opportunities and support for women increase.’

Giving comes in many forms - money, time, knowledge, resources and support. Each has its place and importance, but the acts of giving that are genuinely reciprocal often leave the most lasting impact for everyone involved.

Reciprocity by design: Routes’ mentoring programme

Routes’ mentoring programme, which has been at the core of our work since 2018, is built on the understanding that relationships and networks are essential in rebuilding a life and career. It was designed as a programme of mutual impact - both on refugee and asylum-seeking women who join us as mentees, and professional women across sectors who join us as mentors. Mentees are supported to reach their goals and grow in confidence, whilst their mentors are supported to develop impactful and compassionate leadership skills. Along the way, both gain insights into experiences that are often very different to those in their usual networks or communities, broadening perspectives and fostering mutual understanding. A perfect encapsulation of Give to Gain.

‘This mentoring experience shaped my leadership skills in ways I never expected. It helped me recognize how essential soft skills—such as empathy, inclusivity, non-directive communication, collaboration, and support—are to being an effective and inclusive leader [...] Through this experience, I learned not only that these qualities are fundamental to good leadership, but also how to intentionally incorporate them into real leadership opportunities. This shift in perspective has been incredibly meaningful.’  - Mentor, 2026

Too often mentoring is positioned as an act of generosity, rather than a mutually beneficial relationship. Framing it this way reinforces an unequal dynamic, placing the mentor in a position of authority and the mentee as the passive recipient of goodwill. At Routes, we try to shift the balance of power towards something more equitable by designing our programme explicitly around the growth of both mentor and mentee, and by clearly recognising the value mentors gain from participating. A fundamental part of our mentor training focuses on inclusive practice, encouraging mentors to examine the assumptions they may carry (many rooted in cognitive bias that may go unnoticed) and to recognise how these shape the way they interpret other people’s experiences. This reflection is essential for building equity and allyship. It allows mentors to focus on listening to what their mentee is actually saying, rather than responding to assumptions about who they think that person is. In doing so, mentors gain valuable new perspectives, skills and experiences, all while giving their time and knowledge. 

"I developed a greater appreciation for the different journeys that people take to achieve their goals. It brought me a lot of joy to share a positive feeling, offer a listening ear, and work on practical exercises with my mentee so she could continue to make progress in her life's journey. She brought her whole self to each meeting, no matter the difficulties of the day. Something I wish to emulate as a leader." - Mentor, 2026

Giving money is essential

The idea behind Give to Gain raises an important point that giving isn’t just about money. While we wholeheartedly agree with this, it’s also important that we talk honestly about the ways in which non-profits are increasingly stretched for funding, and the impact this has on women and other communities that deserve more. Too many businesses want to support with time rather than money, without considering the broader investment needed to make those contributions truly valuable for the people they aim to support. 

We hear this all too often; organisations wanting to contribute only through volunteering opportunities for their employees, or offering work coaching but not paid work experience. We’ve also had many conversations with businesses asking to ‘access’ the women in our community because they have a product or service that could potentially benefit them. While the intention is often genuine, what’s frequently absent from these conversations is full consideration of the real barriers our community members face - whether that’s unequal access to technology, lack of childcare support, or the impact of unpredictable policy changes. Without that thinking built in from the start, we risk becoming another exercise in visibility and will fall short of translating these opportunities into meaningful outcomes for the women that we work with. 

While these opportunities can be valuable, they come with a hidden cost. Matching willing volunteers with meaningful opportunities to share their time and knowledge - and gain a valuable learning experience - requires significant organisational resource. This work is often expected to be absorbed by organisations like ours for free but instead, there needs to be more openness to discussing what a genuinely reciprocal partnership might look like. Without funding, it becomes hard to sustain our work or expand the reach and impact of our programmes. What we would like to see is a greater awareness of positionality when approaching these conversations, because without financial support, organisations like Routes - and the infrastructure that connects people with opportunities to give time and knowledge - will cease to exist. In 2024, over 900 small charities closed down in the UK, a sharp increase from previous years and a trend that we are seeing continue. 

Strategic giving that delivers for everyone

We have wonderful experiences of collaborating with businesses in dynamic ways that serve both of our interests, and we’d love to connect with more businesses interested in setting up reciprocal partnerships. Real impact (or real gain) requires strategic giving: combining time, knowledge and resources with financial investment in the infrastructure that makes these contributions sustainable and outcome-driven. Through partnerships that include financial support, we can explore:

• Inviting employees onto our mentoring programme. They’ll get 15 hours of training and the opportunity to hone their new skills while mentoring a woman from our community. 

• Setting up work placements for refugee women in your workplace. We prepare and match suitable candidates for your position and provide wraparound support through the placement.

• We can deliver high quality training or consultation on inclusive leadership with your teams. 

• We can provide data that will help you deliver your ESG or impact goals. 

• We can connect you with trusted socially impactful ITAD (IT Asset Disposal) partners for donating much-needed tech equipment (e.g. laptops), who can manage secure redistribution and provide relevant impact reporting. 

• We’re open to other ideas if you are looking for something different but related to our scope of work. 

‘I couldn't recommend the mentoring programme more. For anyone interested in leading in a way that challenges what we've come to know as our common experience - top down, hierarchical etc. Routes provide the most refreshing counter point. I've learnt so much about the ways in which we can empower others while being a leader and I think the working world would be a much better place if everyone took part in this experience.’ - Mentor, 2025

15 moments from Routes’ 15th Mentoring Cohort

Routes 15th Mentoring cohort mentees and mentors with Routes Mentoring Programme Managers Shunn and Tamana at the end of programme celebration event.

In the first week of February 2026, we came together at St Margaret’s House The Gallery Cafe to celebrate the journeys of our 15th mentoring cohort, who began their mentoring experience with Routes in October 2025. Over four months, mentors and mentees shared time, stories, challenges, and growth. As the programme came to a close after 4 months, Mentoring Programme Manager Tamana Safi reflect on what unfolded, not just in outcomes, but in the many small, meaningful moments that shaped this journey for women from different backgrounds.

As we come to the end of our 15th mentoring programme, we are ending this programme with 15 mentors and mentees, we’re pausing, as we always try to,  to notice what really happened, reflect, what we have learned and what are our key take-aways from the programme.

Not outcomes alone, there is a lot that happened and we all have a lot of moments.

Because mentoring doesn’t move in straight lines. It moves in conversations, in pauses, in small shifts that are easy to miss unless you’re paying close attention.

Regeena (alumni mentee) and fellow Mentoring Programme participants at the end of programme celebration event.

Below are fifteen moments from our 15th programme. None of them belong to just one person. They belong, in different ways, to everyone who took part in our 15th cohort.

1. It begins, as it often does, with a two line introduction and three words on personality, held without needing to be fixed or to be changed.
2. A first meeting started with excitement plus nervousness, with names spoken carefully and loudly, with expectations laid down, like a table we agree to share.
3. A story of studying by candlelight, shared slowly, with care and passion.
4. A confidence shaken at a job centre, and slowly rebuilt somewhere safer.
5. A CV is opened, closed, and opened again - revisited and rewritten, until it finally feels like it belongs to the person whose name is at the top.
6. A mock interview turns into laughter. Not because it is easy, but because it is safe.
7. A session where the goal steps back, and listening takes its place.
8. An unexpected email that quietly opens a door of opportunities
9. A first TikTok video was posted, and pride allowed it to land without apology.
10. A strength exercise that changes how someone speaks about themselves and tells their story with pride and autonomy.
11. An in-person meeting that makes everything feel more real.
12. A boundary named, around work, family, time, or energy, and respected.
13. A qualification passed amid childcare, pain, exhaustion, and persistence.
14. A mentor learning alongside, not ahead.
15. A closing moment where someone says, simply: 

““I feel closer now.”
“I feel connected now.”
“We’ll stay in touch.”
And someone reads aloud a “Letter to Your Future Self.””

— Mentee, 2026

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Closer to confidence.
Closer to clarity.
Closer to themselves.

In the words of Tamana this is what Routes 15 Mentoring Programme have taught us: change doesn’t always announce itself loudly. Often, it arrives quietly, through trust, consistency, and being met where you are.

We’re grateful to every mentor and mentee who brought their full selves into these spaces, and to the many moments,  seen and unseen,  that shaped this journey.

As we close our 15th programme, we carry this with us: progress can be gentle, and still be real.

As we close this chapter, we’re already looking ahead. Each cohort teaches us something new, and we carry those learnings into the next group of mentoring relationships. This is not the final closure, we look forward to welcoming all our 15th graduate pairs in our alumni community and we look forward to the moments that will unfold there, in their own time and in their own way.

Routes 16th Mentoring Programme starts in March 2026. We can't wait to welcome a new cohort onto our Programme and we're hoping to almost double the size of the next cohort. Stay tuned for stories from current and future participants!

Please do reach out to tamana@routescollective.com if you are interested in supporting our Mentoring Programme.

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